This is why you’re not getting a new laptop
We’ve had this discussion before. It’s rule #2 of getting into my good books, and you are apparently incapable of following it, so let me make this abundantly clear.
I’d be much more inclined to give you a nice new laptop if the last one I gave you hadn’t ended up looking like this:
You see, it’s really quite simple. If you don’t respect the equipment, I don’t respect you.
Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.